don't you think it's weird that the punk aesthetic was based on fetish wear and now somehow it's revolutionary to think of the punk aesthetic as sexy?
-al
2.27.2004
here come the brides
oh man, i'm so excited. gay marriage is coming to ny! the mayor of new paltz (a bit more than an hour north of the city) is going to marry some gay people to eachother tomorrow! i spent some time today, before i knew about this, trying to convince my mom, who is an ordained minister in some kind of internet church, to find someone willing to write the marriage certificates so she could start marrying people (one of her legal qualifications). and here someone is. so anyway, if you are in love with someone who is the same gender as you and you're interested, the metro north train goes to new paltz. i think it's the harlem line. maybe the hudson. check it.
al
-al
2.23.2004
no subject
i feel like crap for no reason. the house is a mess but i can't bring myself to do anything. we're looking for another roommate, which sucks, because we're moving out so soon. and we just had to find a new roommate. this shit just doesn't end. i'm so sick of it. osc better do all the apartment finding. but then we'll end up in the slope and i don't want to move out of this area. grrrrr.
we had dsl for about 6 weeks and now they say we can't have it. our loop is too long. fuckers. and of course, no cable. what the fuck? and it's all not worth it anyway cause we're moving out in two months, right? but who's gonna want to live in this messy noisy place without even high speed internet? huh? you?
so i guess i'm stressed. which unfortunately for me means i shut the fuck down. what an amazingly bad response to stress. what the hell?
this is a stupid post i know.
-al
1.25.2004
it's your obsession
my obsession is the past. it's so dumb. anyway, my friend just told me that it was obvious i had a crush on this person i had a crush on. and now i feel like, 'damn! it was obvious, this means that a- everyone knew, which makes me embarrassed and b- it was obvious, so the crushee knew and just didn't like me back!' now, while these aren't completely unreasonable things to think, the crush in question was like 8 years ago. what the hell is wrong with me?
al
-al
1.23.2004
why can't we be friends?
so for the first time since his wedding, i hung out with my brother. this was 2 tuesdays ago. just the two of us. it was a little weird but not too weird. except what we did was go see a taping of the sitcom whoopi, which, as you may or may not know, is really awful. all the jokes are either about whoopi's character being a drunk, or they are about race. and it would be one thing if they were at all funny or witty or anything really. but they are tired. really tired.
anyway, half way through the taping, well, maybe more than halfway, i fucking came down with some horrible illness and had to go home, where i upchucked all on the stairs in the hallway (thanks to whoever cleaned that up) and then again just outside my apartment. then after a few more hocks into the toilet i fell asleep on the floor of the bathroom. eventually i got up, made a few phone calls for comfort, texted dom to tell him i got home ok, took my temperature, which i failed at a few times, and then went to bed for as long as i could. i was ok the next day.
so i emailed him to say sorry about ditching him and stuff and he hasn't written back. i feel like there are like dating rules here but since it's not dating i don't know what to do. but i don't have anything to invite him to do. in the summer he is moving to connecticut and i guess he'll be sort of gone for good. which is sad for me.
sorry if i'm being a little incoherent. it's late, i feel funny. i dont' know what's wrong. probalby dehydrated or something. but anyway, as an aside, it would have been much much much cooler if i'd waited it out at whoopi and fucking thrown up in the studio. right? right. i want to make a throwing up stories zine. yeah. yeah. i would write about throwing up at the UN. though it sounds cooler when you don't know the details.
al
-al
like the corners of my mind
i dreamt about my fucking highschool reunion. when will this end?!? i really thought i was over this shit. at least it took place in the future (the reunion should be next year sometime). i don't even care. i know what everyone is doing. i know i don't have to impress them. what is it that makes me feel unresolved? i also dreamt i found a gameboy underwater, which is just weird.
i also thought i heard a mouse at 5 am. i dont' know if i did hear, but it freaked me the fuck out and then i had to go play pipe dreams for a while and then i tried to sleep but i just kept fucking thinking. though at least not about the mouse. i thought alot about ladyfest actually. i thought about how i can see why there should be ladyfests but how i also kind of think there could be something better. something not lady specific. something that is just a fest with default lady domination, like how most fests are male dominated. or something. i also think it would be cool if ladyfests focused more specifically on their area. i know they do, but often the same people will play ladyfests all over but you know, they are only from one place.
so now it's 3 and i'm still up. argh. what is wrong with me. actually, i sort of know. i keep forgetting to take my meds. but you'd think that wouldn't completely fuck me. you know?
and now.... i will list for you movies i've seen because i work at coney's:
1. Mommie Dearest (over and over and over and over)
2. a joan crawford documentary, i don't know the name or where it's from. (over and over)
3. Just Married.
4. Straight Jacket (starring joan crawford, a few times over)
5. Alice In Wonderland (i had seen it before, but i probably wouldn't have ever seen it again)
6. Deathrace 2000 (though i rented it myself)
7. When Animals Talk
8. Sweatin' To The Oldies 2
9. Casino Royalle (added 1/23)
i'm sure i'll remember some more later. stay tuned....
they played warriors when i wasn't there. damn them. i want to see that.
-al
fucking yeah
so i watched Deathrace 2000 at work today. i remember that i saw it a lot of times when i was little and it left a 'naughty' feeling when i thought about it but i couldn't really remember it. now i'm thinking about buying it. but maybe that is silliy since i just saw it. seriously though, go watch this movie.
also, i now have a crush on mary woronov who played calamity jane in the movie. you probably know her as the the principle from rock and roll highschool (another movie that left the naughty impression on me for whatever reasons). anyway, i had no idea she was like a b movie star. i just always recognized her when i saw her as 'that lady'. but she was all in with warhol and stuff. i want to read her books now but the library (i've sworn off paying for books for a while) doesn't seem super keen on her. you know what they should have? a netflix for books. would that even make sense? probably not. but it would be neat.
oh, and remember that bit about needing a job? if it involve cataloging stuff like i was a librarian that would be cool. but i can also dance. or bartend. or barista (which is probably not a verb). or be an escort's driver/bodyguard, though i don't have my own car. or be a 'sexy lady for roleplay only'. no, i'm serious.
-al
sigh
so i was just looking at jasmine's livejournal because she said there was a picture of me there and the pictures she had on there made me want a digital camera real bad. add that to the fact that i want a fucking g4 powerbook and, well, if anyone wants to give me a few thousand dollars, i will totally call you and say thanks. now, don't you want me to call you and say thanks? right.
seriously though, g4 powerbook=awesome. so awesome. phew.
so coney's (where i work) has been so slow. slower than before christmas i think. and i know/hope it's totally related to the fucking arctic cold somehow or other and i really dont' want to quit. i really like it there, it's pretty dope. yeah, i said dope. why do you always have to make me so self concious? huh? anyway, i need another job. an additional job. i need to make a lot of money with only a little work. isn't that what we all deserve? right. so i saw a go go dancers wanted listing on craigslist and i totally want to respond, but you need a 'recent photo' and well, the only one i have is on on jasmine's livejournal and it's not appropriate. which of course, just brings us back to how i want a digital camera. woo. though honestly i don't even know what kind of picture would be appropriate.
seriously though if anyone has a job opening that's like 2 days a week, let me know.
-al
