i was the target of the wrath of some clique of socialites (one of the ones who wasn't involved in the stalking was dating leonardo dicaprio). i don't remember why they hated me, but they did. i'm not sure if they were trying to kill me but i was really scared. and they were always where i was. i remember i was friends with someone who was their friend and i guess they were mad at her or something? and then i remember driving this weird car where you accelerate by pulling on this handle and steering was really hard and you just go really really really fast. i did that before the stalking started and then again while i was trying to lose them. but they were always watching me. i often caught the one with the blond hair and glasses, the nerdy one, watching me from around a corner as i walked away from them. i couldn't walk fast enough. somehow i got nudified. i took a shower or something. i was wearing underpants and a towel. i tried to hide in a restaurant (i tried to fool them into thinking i was in a different restaurant, but therew ere so many of them, that they often just happened to be where i was. they weren't all stalking me, but they would see me and then tell the other people, oh, i saw her at blah blah, and then they'd know where i was. so i go in this restaurant and then some of them come in and i drop down behind this low wall with a stuffed sheep on it. then, to my complete horror actually, i notice that the sheep (which is really cute) is alive, and it jumps down and i pet it. but then i'm thinking, ok, i'm naked with a sheep. this is not going to look good. this is how they're gonna get me. so i get out of there. but some of them are on the street. but then this carful of younger kids (i know i'm younger in the dream, like i'm not 25, but i don't think i'm a teenager either. i think i'm probably like 22 or something), the kids hate the socialites (and they think i'm with the socialites) so they're throwing something at them. but the socialites get real mad and one is like, 'that girl is only 17. she's never seen out clique get rough' or something more threatening. anyway, i use the opportunity of their distraction to run around a corner and i jump onto this weird deck that's kind of like a hallway with low walls and sunken rooms. but it's all wood and it's outside with no roof. anyway, i kind of crouch and hide and then i realised there's a person kid there (not like a little kid, like a 19 year old) and he looks kind of nerdy in a metal way and not a socialite so i make a shush with my finger. but then a woman is coming but she's below and she talks to him about his laundry and he responds. but then she's coming and she's gonna see me and i figure she's going up the front steps, so i crouch on the back steps but i lose my towel (it snags, this all happens in a matter of seconds) and then she's coming up the back and i freak out and i'm like trying to jump over the low wall but she sees me and to my surprise of course acts really glad to see me and says something to the kid about his friend, me, and then goes in the house. so then i feel a little safer and i sit down next to the kid and pull a blanket over myself and i'm like, um, i'm being stalked. and he's like, oh. and i'm like, so is that your mom (i remember that the kid looked white but the woman looked black.) and he was like 'yeah'. and i was like, 'um, i guess she's cool with naked chicks.' or something and he's like, 'yeah, she's cool. i don't normally have girls over' or something. and i tell him what's going on with the socialites and he says something like, 'if you're not one of them why doyou shave' and then i say, 'i don't shave! way not to look at me naked!' and he was like, 'it's butt colored and fleshy, that's all i saw' and he kind of smiles sheepishly. then we talk a bit and he tells me how he plays drums and how he loves drums and this cool thing he's gonna do with guitar and drums when he learns to play guitar and i tell him i play bass and i decide he's pretty cool and we hang out for a while. i guess time passes and i put on a shirt because then ammi comes running out onto the deck, 'alison!' and i'm like, 'why are you here' because if she's there for no reason, it's probably because the socialites are there and she says that some of the socialites (she uses their names, she's friends with them as i am) are there (the ones that aren't actually stalking me, the one who is dating leonardo dicaprio) and i they don't know i'm there. she's telling me to lay low and then some people come out into the hallway, so i go into one of the sunken rooms and the kid comes and ammi sits on the step and then egypt (my cat, she died) comes and ammi's like, 'it's egypt' (she's surprised since egypt died) and when i turn to look, i realise people are coming and egypt jumps down into the room so i pet her and just avoid the people like i don't know them (they arne't talking to the kid either, just ammi) and i hope they don't recognize me. apparently they don't. i end up hiding out at this kids house for a while. i have another memory of talking to leonardo's girlfriend about how great i thought it was that she was in love and leo seemed like a real person. she was nice and not stalking me after all.
i guess that's all i remember. i think that this dream must have to do with my discomfort being a hipster/with hipsters.
-al
7.04.2003
so ho ho
i've come to the conclusion that everyone is insane. they're concepts of themselves, what they do and what is going on in the world are totally warped. now, it's really hard to believe that everyone is insane. so, now i'm forced to actually believe that it's me who is insane. does no one else see this? how could he really think that? how could she really believe that? so i guess it's me.
-al
